2 Years 7 Months 23 Days
by RegretNotForgetNot
Summary: A tale of longing, desire, and wishes in the lives of should-have-been high school sweethearts Bella and Edward, only to have been separated by life, and then rejoined by the sweetest of circumstances. ExB ALL HUMAN
1. Prologue: Sweet Darlin'

_So sweet Darlin',_

_Why don't you pretend we were just a dream?  
It's cool, baby, it doesn't matter anyway…_

_("Just Missed The Train" by Kelly Clarkson)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

**Prologue: Sweet Darlin' (Bella's POV)**

Time does heal all wounds, I believe that from experience - but nobody ever told me that it couldn't heal them _completely_. God, why did you make life so unfair? I want so badly to get away from the endless cycle I've become fossilized in. Numbness has engulfed me to no end. I long for the warm embrace that erased my worries so easily before…. I hate this emptiness. I…

I don't know anymore.

I don't know how to go back to him anymore.

Of all the things that manage to affect me - like my fear of thunder, or aversion to pickles - none could do so much damage such as the next two words I'm about to name…

_Edward Cullen_.

I knew from the moment I laid eyes on him during the student orientation day in our freshman year that I had found the man I would spend the rest of my life with. _My best friend for life_.

A week had passed, and the excitement of people (mainly girls) around him had not died down at all. Only he seemed to be indifferent to them, giving them smiles that didn't reach his eyes, and replied with short, polite answers to their obstinate small talk. I knew of this because _my_ eyes couldn't be pried away from his face. Apparently, the people _trying_ to become friends with him couldn't get something _that_ obvious - that he wasn't having a good time.

They were only looking at the surface and nothing beyond his appearance. His face that was angular at just the right places, the piercing green of his eyes… looking as if they could see right through you, and lastly, the devastatingly hypnotizing crooked smile he flashed which signaled when he was genuinely happy. They knew nothing of the underlying emotions that swayed him.

I couldn't stand it, he looked so alone. Amongst the sea of people around him, I saw that he was just too polite to ask to be excused, or much more refuse anyone for anything. I wanted to help.

Aside from that… I knew, oh believe me, _I knew_, I knew of the ogling eyes of the girls - and even some guys - that were focused on _him_. I was one of them.

The only exception I had from the others was that I had let go of all my inhibitions for one moment and did the unthinkable: as a child would, I walked up to him during lunch while he was seated alone and simple asked, "Hi, Edward! Uh, sorry, umm… don't take this the weird way, dude. I mean, you looked pretty uncomfortable around those… people… and so yeah. What I wanted to say was, do you wanna be friends? Like, friend friends? And I actually mean it!" I smiled the friendliest smile I could, completely aware of the blush that had crept its way up to my hairline. I held my breath as I dreaded for his reply…

This was not something I would normally do.

In the back of my mind, a small voice was chanting: what has gotten INTO YOU?! But way to go, Bella! But… !! What was that?! Wait, except you ROCKED!! It was like a mental tug of war, neither side winning. I had really considered my 14 year old brain that of a 9 year old ones instead, developmentally (as of that moment, at least).

Then suddenly, as if my brain could handle more debate in its far recesses, I was given a reaction that made me feel like a child on Christmas morning receiving _the exact_ same gift she wanted. He shot me his crooked smile with no trace of suspicion nor skepticism, the sign that he _was actually_ delighted.

"I would like that very much, Bella," as he took out his hand, asking for a handshake. I was more than happy to oblige. "Please sit down and eat lunch with me."

_How did he know my name?_

I was just glad enough that he said yes to my proposition, and even invited me to eat with him, that I simply let my curiosity go and shook his hand. Still grinning, I obediently complied and sat down in front of him.

"Thank you, Edward." As another blushed crept up my cheeks, if that was possible.

"So, how was your day so far?" he started, sounding as if we were childhood friends, strangeness completely gone. Our conversation just continued from there… feeling as if it was the most natural thing to do.

I'm pretty sure I was blushing a thousand shades of crimson the whole time, but I didn't care. I didn't care where I was, who I was, or if time stopped altogether. In the cafeteria of a busy high school, me… plain Jane _Bella_, was eating together with my new friend.

Edward Cullen.

It felt like I had sealed my fate with that last word…

_Friend._

Edward Cullen.

What have I done?

And that is how the invincible Edward Cullen became my best friend. Nothing big, really, from what you could see on the surface. But nobody could tell of the chaos of the war that was going on in my heart during the duration of high school… at least that's what I'd hope.

I didn't know at the time… No, the 14 year old me at the time did not know how much of an impact this boy would make on my life. I didn't know that I'd be here… 8 years later, reminiscing about the "good old days". Nostalgia and longing swollen in my heart.

I'm 22 years old now. I was an English major at the University of Southern California just half a year ago, currently a bookstore owner in Monrovia, California. Yes, I'm Isabella Swan… your typical Plain Jane, yes indeed.

It's been 2 years, 7 months and 23 days since I've last seen him - the reason I _live_.

Not that I'm counting or anything.

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**Author's notes:**

**The reason behind the song: I didn't mean it for like, Bella saying **_**bye**_** to Edward or something. I just meant it… in the opposite way. Yes, I know, my brain works **_**backwards **_**sometimes lol. Sometimes I catch myself saying the opposite of what I truly meant, and I was imagining that Bella would say that to Edward when they departed. By hiding her feelings, he wouldn't get hurt. Sigh, they're both idiots sometimes (my fault though lol) anywayyyyyyyyy…**

**I think I'll make this story sappy and sad but still heart wrenchingly romantic. I hate sad endings. I'll never write sad endings, I swear. Don't worry, all!!**

**THE POINT IS!! The song is about Bella telling Edward to just forget about it even though she doesn't really mean it that their thing wasn't ..worth it at all grah confusing.**


	2. Freshman Year: Early Mornings

_This could be the start_

_Of something new._

_It feels so right_

_To be here with you._

_("Start of Something New" from High School Musical)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

**Freshman Year, Early Mornings **

**(Bella's POV)**

I remember it clear as day, the day Edward and I started going to school together. It's been too long…

One morning, as I was dreaming the usual dream of me-almost-being-kissed-by-Edward-only-to-wake-up-just-before-the-kiss, I felt myself being pulled up to the surface of consciousness by the most interesting, yet good, feeling ever. Someone was stroking my left cheek lightly, removing my hair from my face at the same time. I'm a sleeping-on-my-belly person, that's why - imagine the mess I am in the morning yet?

"Wake up, sweet miss butterfingers…" said the smooth velvety voice. It was the same one that started haunting my dreams 6 months ago, and so upon hearing it again, I thought I was still dreaming.

"Mmm… Ed… ward… I'm not a ca-candy… bar…" I replied, while burying my face into my pillow. Still, a small giggle escaped my mouth. Edward always caused that. We've been "best friends" for 6 months and a week now, not that I'm counting or anything.

The voice chuckled softly releasing its ever so calming sound then said, "I know, but you're still sweet… but it's time to wake up…" The voice was eargasmic, to say the least.

"… Edward… you're… so… mmm…" I continued, talking into the pillow, while trying to go back to deep slumber.

"Bella, I'm so… what…?" he replied, sounding amused and pleased. Again, the sound seemed as if it originated from somewhere… or someone, too close.

_Wait. _A small part of me realized that the conversation in my dream sounded too _real_ to be a dream. However, sleepiness got to the better of me so I brushed off the thought quickly.

"Five m-more…" I tried to reply, but my tongue was betraying me, causing my words slur somewhat.

The voice then continued with a light laugh, "oh Bella, you're seriously not going to say _minutes_, are you?" It was so soothing, but before I could relish in the sound of it longer, my eyes snapped open by reflex, only to find a pair of emerald green eyes staring right back at me. _Uh-oh._

"It's seven thirty, butterfingers… we're almost late for school," cooed the _thing_ that could very well paralyze an army of swooning women with one look, dangerously close to my lips. At age 15, he could do _this _to an innocent girl (me and the rest of the girls at school) - I have to wonder, what'll he be able to do at 21?! His face was still mere inches from mine, and the distance caused me to forget how to breathe.

Have I mentioned that he was smiling? Yeah, smiling! It was his infamous, heart stopping gorgeous grin. I'd like to have _that_ every morning, first thing when I wake up.

On a more important note, if I hadn't lost my ability to speak due to the said_ thing _that paralyzed my vocal chords, I would have screamed. Needless to say, the formula of Edward plus my room multiplied by the fact that it was early in the morning, raised to the power of my having just woke up was… epic. I'm known for sleep talking, you see. And I know for a fact that I was, coincidentally, just dreaming about the exact same person who just woke me up. Wouldn't that be cause for some worry, especially in my case?

Edward's face was still inches away from mine, flashing his devastatingly perfect smile. His eyes twinkled in amusement, and some other emotion I wasn't sure of…

The point is I was shocked frozen, still lying down on my side with my eyes open wide. I only snapped out of it when Edward was waving his hand in front of my face.

"Hellooo..? Anyone in there?" said the Adonis in front of me.

"E-ed…ward?! Wha…what are you doing h-here?!" I managed to croak out this much then sat up, suddenly remembering my hair must look like an after effect of too much head banging at a rock concert. I blushed, as if on cue. _How miserably horrible I must look right now, ugh…_

"You're still as pretty as yesterday, if not more," Edward said cooly. _Did he just read my mind?!_

"GAH! What? What?? Sheesh, your eyes have gone bad! Wait, don't sidetrack me!" I said, denying what his compliment and trying to hide the chagrin. Of course, I totally and completely loved it - that _the _Edward Cullen just complimented me. _Oh be still, my heart._

The blush I must have had on my face was probably redder than beets. "Um, um, um…" I tried to smooth out my hair to some degree, but before I could finish, I was further shocked by what Edward did. He yanked off my blanket, and I thanked God in the heavens above that I wore good pajama bottoms - not the ones with the Blues Clues print from fourth grade - and a shirt that wasn't too embarrassing. Grinning at me, he then pulled me up by my arms, helping me stand up, much like a five year old would be assisted.

"Thanks, _dad_," I grumbled to Edward.

" Welcome, hun," He beamed, then continued, "Now hurry up and get ready. Charlie left you some breakfast downstairs. He left about fifteen minutes ago, telling me to wake you up, if that's what you're wondering. And yes, that's the reason I'm in your room."

"Oh. Charlie. Right." It hadn't crossed my mind that my father was there to not allow any male being enter my room without his permission. Still, why had he let _Edward_ enter? Very odd, very odd indeed.

After I finished fixing myself up for school, I went down and found the breakfast Edward was talking about. It was, to say the least, delicious. It made me wonder, had Charlie really prepared this breakfast? It didn't seem likely, but I shrugged off the thought, not delving too deep in the idea. As I was taking my third bite, I just couldn't stand it anymore. I snapped my head up and looked at Edward then said, "Is there something on my face?"

Edward had been unabashedly staring at me from the moment I sat down, and much as I _love_ that (of course, he wouldn't - will not - know about that), I was getting more embarrassed by the second.

"No, not really - I was just thinking," he said, as he continued smiled, then took a bite of his strawberry pop tart.

"Uh… okay. So tell me, why are you really here, aside from making me blush to death?" curious, so I asked him.

He chuckled, "well, since the first day of school, you've been late for first period more than 20 times, and since I'm so nice, I just thought I'd start picking you up early so you won't be late anymore."

I laughed at my own inability for punctuality at this, and said, "Oh, gee, thanks for the charity, Eddie," continuing to smile back at him.

"Silly Bella, it isn't _charity_. I'm your friend, and since you're my friend, you're the only one allowed to call me that, too." He then laughed lightly.

"Call you what?" I asked, trying to fight the urge not to swoon at his laughing voice.

"Eddie, of course," he replied, "Only you, no one else."

Edward started walking towards our front door, and I followed. He opened it for me, and as usual, the impeccable gentleman side of his was brought to life and he motioned for me to exit first. I did so, then after he closed the door, I turned back to lock it. I didn't mind that it was kind of useless, since I had to go back and lock it myself anyway when I could've just gone out last by myself _then_ locked it. But no, Edward doesn't let me do that - ever. And I like that. Even if it's kind of useless, like I said.

"Shall we, princess?" he said, then I looked to where he was, and saw him sitting on his bike.

"I'm too heavy," I stated simply.

"So? I'm heav_ier_, which means I can control both our weights. Besides, I'm a guy," _I know, and you're the most perfect one _ever_. _I could only tell him so much.

"Haha, all right," I told him, as I sat down behind him sideways, facing the left, so my right shoulder was kind of leaning on his back. _He's… so… warm… back's…so… warm… _was what I was thinking, and that's where all mental processes of mine kind of, uh, stopped. "Hold on tight, Bella," he said.

Before I could pass out right then and there from hyperventilating due to our close proximity, I recalled what he had said earlier.

_Only you, no one else, _echoed in my mind again and again. I couldn't help but feel like jumping around the room declaring my undying _infatuation_ with him, but of course I didn't. I didn't want him to know I was overjoyed by the mere fact _I_ was special to him. _I_ am_ a favorite, _I thought,_ I'm his… friend, duh_.

Friend.

There goes my bubble bursting.

How I long to be that close to him again, I cannot put into words at all. I remember _exactly_ how warm he was. I remember how simply leaning on his back caused the current of electricity I felt from his body pass through to my shoulder, up my neck, giving me goosebumps. Just the thought of it sends a shiver down my spine.

This was 8 years ago.

I'm a coward.

Now, it's been 2 years, 7 months and 23 days since I've last seen, spoken to, or even heard from…. _Edward Cullen._

And again, like I said, not like I'm counting, or anything.

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**Author's notes:**

**Why can't guys understand that opening doors for girls and holding it for them to exit/enter first is ****always**** a good gesture that is always appreciated? Like seriously, I know there are some girls who are too bitchy to not appreciate that, but I know **_**I**_** appreciate it every time! Point is, some guys don't even try. Weren't they raised right by their momma?!**

**Though I think to subject guys with that kind of obligation IS unfair. So I don't make it like, a necessity to call someone gentlemanly. I just mean that the effort is that counts, and I, for one, always appreciate it. Though I race my guy friends(who are all gentlemen, really) each time they try to do the gesture for me. In their case, I just… I don't know, I like being fair to them lol so I open the door for **_**myself**_**. Or for him, too, even. I'm shutting up now!**


	3. Freshman Year: Scent

_You, do you remember me,  
Like I remember you?  
Do you spend your life,  
Going back in your mind to that time?_

_("Somebody's Me" by Enrique Iglesias)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

**Freshman Year, Scent**

**(Bella's POV)**

Until this very day, I keep a bottle of the perfume Edward first started to wear 8 years ago. Why? Because it smells _good_. And… whenever I get whiff of this scent, it feels like a small flashback into the past - of my moments with him.

_Six thirty a.m., Wednesday, February 2, 8 years prior._

"_Knock knock, Edward…?" Ever so softly, I called out to Edward just outside his bedroom door. I wasn't one to tempt fate - much as I would love to see him clad only in his jeans, I didn't want to be rejected this particular morning._

"_Edward, you up yet?"I continued to say in a small voice, careful not to wake up the whole household. I was already a regular here, considered another daughter to the Cullen household._

_The only difference today was that it was the first time I had woken up earlier than Edward, and so I decided to be the one to wake _him_ up instead. I was so excited that I stumbled over thin air a total number of 8 times on my way to his house. It was a short 10 minute walk. But it didn't matter - I get to see him, and that's what really counts._

_Sounds of rushed footsteps and rustling cloth emanated through his door._

"_B-bella? Is that you?!" Edward replied quietly but still sounded excited. He seemed surprised that I was indeed in his house, so he quickly all but ran to his door by the sound of things. He, as per usual, greeted me with his if-smiles-could-kill grin upon opening his door. _

My memories of him…

Of the mornings and the first thing I saw was him, waking me up and telling me we were almost late for school. Of the times I appreciated how his blue shirt made him look all the more handsome. Of the way he looked so at ease riding his bicycle. Of the times he turned around to face me, smiling his 100 watt smile. Of the way his midnight blue backpack securely hung on his right shoulder. Of how his faint trace of a dimple appeared on his right cheek when he smiled.

_I gasped inaudibly at what I saw._

_He had just showered. His hair appeared darker in shade due to still being damp. A towel hung on his left shoulder, and fortunately - yet sadly, as the thought crept the back of my mind - he was wearing a shirt. However, water droplets continued to run down the side of his neck, then to his shoulders, collar bone, and you know the rest. _

_It took all of my will power _not_ to succumb into the horrid desire to go up to him… tilt my head by the crook of his neck and…._

_Holy. _

_Snap out of it, Bella! It's JUST water! That happens to be running down his neck! How I wanted to kiss him senseless right then and there._

Of how his room was painted a deep blue, with dark grey contrasting strips that ran horizontally near the floor. Of how he looked when he had his headphones on, listening to his extensive collection of classical music. Of how his hands look, intertwined with a pen while writing.

"_H…hi." I breathed out, trying to conceal my now obvious blush. "I j-just thought I'd… pick you up this morning?"_

_He smiled. That was all to say about it. If being too dazzled could kill, I'd have died and gone to heaven many times already. He then chuckled and said, "thanks for the wakeup visit, beautiful. Hang on, let me just grab my backpack and other things, and then I'll make you some breakfast."He walked up to his chest of drawers and pulled something out. It was a small blue bottle. He then sprayed it on his shirt twice, then once on his wrist and then rubbed it with the other. _

Ah, his perfume. The only thing is, even though the scent reminds me _of_ him, it doesn't completely catch his essence. Edward, by himself, distinctly smells sweet… and spicy. It is as if his scent was an exotic mixture of honey and cinnamon. That, along with this perfume, used to almost drive me insane with the desire to cling on to him for dear life, just burying my face into his perfect, chiseled chest.

_It took just one second for my body to react to his new scent. Sweet at first… spicy for the second, and deep and… like a guy, for the last. He walked to stand by me, backpack on his left shoulder. He stopped by his doorway, dangerously close to me face-to-face. He smelled delicious._

This scent… once in a while, I still spray his perfume on my wrist, rubbing it with my other wrist much in the same fashion as he did.

_I want him, I want him, I want him _right now_. Those words echoed in my mind a thousand times over. If it wasn't bad enough that I had wanted to remove the drops of water on his neck with my lips, this had done the job just fine. The job of wanting to give in to my desires for Edward Cullen._

_Realization hit once again. "Are you going on a date or something later?" I asked, concealing the pain in my gut from bubbling out, desperately trying not to sound like a jealous - gulp - girlfriend-wannabe._

"_Not really, just got this from mom yesterday and wanted to try it on. You like?" he then asked, and continued, "she even told me about the… wrist thing." Not embarrassed one bit by that feminine gesture with perfumes he learned from his mother, while biting on his lower lip, as if deep in thought._

"_More than like," I answered him in all honesty, feeling my knees weaken. I felt another blush on my cheeks rise, along with another round of desire - this time, to bite his lower lip for him - came about. Our eyes met, and the electricity between us roared more into life than ever. For goodness sakes…_

_I broke the stare first, then urged him to talk. Awakening from his own daze, he said, "good! In that case," he put the bottle down on his bed side table and continued, "this one is for keeps." Still smiling his 100 watt smile. He somehow found out that I felt weak and was about to pass out, then put his arm over my shoulders and held me by my right side and started to walk down to their kitchen. The arm he had on me made my shoulder tingle…_

"_Um. Kay. What's for breakfast?" I was now holding on to the staircase's hand bars, making sure I wouldn't just devour Edward there while he held me up._

"_Pancakes with strawberries good?" _

"_Perfect!" He knew how to get through to my heart, it was indeed through my stomach. Little did he know that he was already in there, way before he found out that my favorite fruit was strawberry._

This was 8 years ago, and here I am in my pathetic excuse of a life, living in a quaint little apartment in Los Angeles, looking over a park, while holding on to a tiny little blue bottle of Edward's perfume. The sun is about to rise, as I see the faint lightening of the sky into a gentle shade of light blue.

Another day of this half life I've submitted myself into. I work as an editor for a small publishing company, giving me too much time in my whole week, as I didn't need to work in an office as much, to think. To think back. To think of him. To think of what could have been. To think of what should have been.

I'm still a coward.

It's been 2 years, 7 months and 23 days since I've inhaled the enthralling mixture of honey, cinnamon and a tiny blue bottle encased perfume's scent... of the person I _live for_.

Edward Cullen.

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**Author's notes:**

**OH MY GOD PEOPLE I AM SO FREAKING SORRY FOR THE UBER UBER LONG DELAY IN UPDATES! I really am omgggg I had this horrible case of writer's block! BUT IT IS CURED NOW for some odd reason! ANYWAY!! Hope this chapter reeks of desire. I've poured my soul into it! I shall update more asap!**

**Much loves from moi**

**Whipped**


	4. Freshman Year: Klutz

_I'm freezing in the sun;_

_I'm burning in the rain._

_The silence… I'm screaming,_

_Calling out your name. _

_("The Day You Said Good Night" by Hale)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

Freshman Year, Klutz

Seeing as the sun was already above the horizon, I decided to get up off my bed and stop playing with the small bottle of his perfume. _Another day, another 24 hours,_ I thought to myself.

It was 6:30 a.m., just a couple of hours before I had to go to work. It was more of just a formality that I show up there daily, spend a couple of hours doing my _real_ job(which I could do at home), then clock out. I suppose it was a good enough reason for me to leave my apartment - it's unhealthy to stay in here 24/7, though without my job, I would pretty much do just that.

"Breakfast sounds like a good idea, don't you think?" I said to no one in particular, as I made my way into my kitchen.

I wasn't really talking to myself. I was talking to the air around me, as usual, pretending he was here. Not that it made any difference; I still had no reply (am I going crazy? No… that happened the day I left him). I arrived in front of my kitchen's island counter, and started prepare to make some breakfast. After whipping out a couple of eggs and half an onion, I made myself a simple omelet. Something he used to make me as well, for those breakfasts at his house.

I didn't notice the small puddle of water still on the floor that I had spilled the previous night, and the light was dim enough that not a lot of things were illuminated. So… as usual, my left foot slipped, I toppled to my left side, and I managed to break my fall with my left shoulder; another bruise to add to the collection.

For a split second… I thought I would have the same pair of warm, inviting arms there to catch me. It lasted for just about 2 seconds; just enough time for me to wake up and wince at the pain from my newly acquired bruise. As that thought crept through my mind, a stab of pain went through my heart, and I felt my stomach tighten. _He's not here_. If my heart could bleed openly, it would. When will this pain end?

I thought that absence made the heart forget. Wasn't that what people told me?

Sighing, I got up off the floor and brushed some dust off of my pajama bottoms. _Well that sure was a nice start of the day, _I exhaled. After the short breakfast, I decided to kill some time by going to the Starbucks just a couple of blocks down from my apartment. My workplace wasn't that much further away; also a ten minute distance from my apartment. With my laptop in the crook of my left arm and a backpack slung on my right shoulder, I was walking out in the slightly foggy morning.

The short 10 minute walk to the Starbucks was all it took for me to remember that one morning Edward and I had just arrived at school, in a similar day like this. A slight fog made the school courtyard seem hazy, and when I got off of Edward's bike, I accidentally dropped my back pack, only to find out that I hadn't zipped it up properly. All of the contents - from my binders, pencil case, to my lone butterfinger bar - spilled around the back of his bike.

"_See! You're just like your chocolate bar," he laughed. _

_I poked my tongue out at him, as I leaned down to my now empty backpack. "Much as I appreciate your humor so early in the morning, _Eddie_," saying, as I tugged on his sleeve, "I would appreciate help more."_

"_Oh, that's true," he replied, as he pulled me up. _

"_Eh? Why? What, Edward?"I asked incredulously. I had no idea why he made me stand up from my almost-crouching position, as I was attempting to pick up my still-scattered belongings._

"_Go ahead and walk to the bench over there and keep your pretty little self comfy while I get your things, okay?" he told me, as he pointed to the nearby bench._

"_I can't let you do that! At least let me help…" _

"_Um, no, now go be a good girl and sit." He commanded in a half serious and half joking tone._

"_What?! I'm a dog now?!" I replied, in the same tone, raising my eyebrow._

"_Of course not, now the sooner you get over there, the sooner I'll get this done, all right?" he said with finality. _

"_Fine…" I said, still minding that he was talking to me as if I was a five year old, as I noticed my tennis ball that I used as a stress ball roll to the farther edge. Edward had his back turned to me now, picking up my things. I started walking towards the tennis ball, which was also the direction of the bench._

_I figured it was reasonable for me to just pick it up myself without him getting on my case, but as I bent to pick it up, I realized why Edward wasn't letting me pick my things up myself… except it was sort of too late. I forgot I was wearing a skirt. It wasn't particularly short, but it was a particularly windy day. As I bent to pick up the tennis ball, the ordinarily harmless skirt was blown up slightly by the wind. I almost had a heart attack, realizing it was almost a Marilyn Monroe. _

_I shrieked, but not so loudly. This gained me Edward's attention, as he stood up, hurriedly walked to where I was and asked, "are you all right?" _

"_Yeah, I'm ok… just the wind, my skirt… ugh." I blushed._

_He just laughed. "I told you so," he added, while taking another step towards me. He was too close! My face was practically rested on his chest; I could feel his body heat emanating from him. _

"_D-did not," I tried to retort, "you didn't remind me about the wind and my skirt!"_

_He raised his eyebrow and smirked. "Oh, I have to remind you specifically?" He took another step forward, looking as if he was going to tickle me. Oh no._

_As I took a step back, I felt myself step on the tennis ball I was to pick up. I was going to fall, and it felt like I was going to land directly on my bottom. I was preparing myself for the pain upon the impact on hitting the ground. Edward took a sharp intake of breathe. Fortunately, him being so close, Edward caught me by encircling his right arm on my lower back while his left arm supported me by my right shoulder blade. _

"_Walk much, Bella?" he teased. _

_Before I could reply, I felt a sharp pain coming from my right ankle. I'm normally a person who could tolerate a certain amount of pain, but it felt horrible - as if I'd broken a bone and it was sticking out or something. Involuntarily, tears were rolling down my cheeks. It hurt so much!_

"_Oh God, Bella! What's wrong?!" Edward asked frantically. I tried to answer as clearly as I could without my voice cracking, but it was futile. "I t-think I s-s-sprained my a…ankle," I managed to tell him. Worry contorted his perfect face. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have-" he started, but I stopped him by putting a finger up to his lips._

"_Edward Anthony Cullen! Th-this is not your fault! I'm a klutz, and I'm pretty s-sure" I winced, still semi-sobbing, "the whole o…f Forks, i-if not the whole of Wa-washington, know that for a fact! Nobody is bl-blaming you. Now… get me to a hospital, p-please?" I sniffed._

_He reluctantly stopped apologizing, but his eyebrows were still furrowed. "Okay… hang on… I'm going to call my father," he said. He immediately put his right arm under my knees and left arm on my back and carried me to the bench. He sat me down, and pulled out his cell phone from his pocket, still standing in front of me. I didn't even notice that now, both my backpack and his messenger back laid beside me, I was still crying - it hurt! _

"_Hey Dad? It's me. Yeah, umm, listen… Bella sort of sprained her ankle, and I'm not sure if she actually dislocated it… yeah, I would appreciate that," Edward looked at me while mid-sentence and noticed I was still crying. "Thanks Dad, see you soon." He then put me on his lap, and started rubbing soothing circles in my back to sooth the pain. _

"_My dad's on his way, and said he'll pick us up so he can get you checked out." _

_I couldn't protest about Edward missing a day of school just because of me, because I was too distracted by his hand on my back now. I really stopped noticing the pain my foot was sending up to my brain for the most part, but it was still there._

_Oh, and sitting on his lap, smelling the sweet and spicy perfume that hehad on helped too…_

Before I realized it, I had already ordered my coffee at the Starbucks counter, and was sitting at my usual corner table; after just one minute, someone called out "Bella!" signaling my drink was made.

As I walked to the station where they give people their drinks, I winced in pain when I lifted my left hand up and took my cup of café mocha. I turned around, and headed back to my table, and that's when I felt a warm tear drop trickle down my right cheek.

My body was reacting by itself, due to my heart. I didn't even… have the time to think about my reactions anymore. It wasn't just the bruise causing the pain anymore… I didn't have him there to catch me, nor sooth the pain away. There was no spicy sweet scent of the boy I loved.

It's not so much the being-saved part I miss… it's… it's his presence, of him being just an arm's length away that I miss the most.

And now, 2 years, 7 months and 23 days later… with _another_ bruise on my body, I wipe away the tear that escaped from my eye that I thought had long ago run out of tears to cry; and no arms are encircled around me.

I'm a COWARD.

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**Author's note:**

**Okay, I'll try to update more frequently. I'm sorry, all. Really. **


	5. Freshman Year: Silver Lining

_Who wants to be ordinary,_

_In a crazy mixed up world?_

_I don't care what they're saying,_

_As long as I'm your girl._

_("You Get Me" by Michelle Branch)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

**Freshman Year, Silver Lining**

Starbucks at six in the morning is more crowded than in the afternoon. I watched the people do their morning rituals, staring into space with a blank look on my face.

What was wrong with me? It's only a distant memory, why does he still have the power to affect me even now? I was infuriated with myself.

As I attempted to sip some more of my café mocha, someone cleared their throat. I looked up and saw a girl clad in what looked like a designer top. Expensive as it appeared, her image was not salvaged - she still looked slutty instead of classy. "Can I help you with something?" I asked her.

"Uh, yeah, like, this is my seat," she answered with high pitched voice, pointing to where I was seated.

"Um… so?" I tried as much as I could not to raise my eyebrow at her.

"You're sitting in it." She crossed her arms to her chest.

"Excuse me?" I blinked in shock.

Needless to say, I was flabbergasted to find that such behavior was… even happening. Outside of a movie. Did I really look that weak and defenseless?

"Like, HELLO? Move? Or I'm telling Dennis Jackson, I swear! I'm, like, his girlfriend, and he won't even _let_ you, like, get to your classes in peace for the rest of high school if you don't listen to me!" she all but shrieked in my ear.

To this, I really raised my eyebrow and couldn't suppress my laughter. I literally burst out laughing. I had to calm down for a few seconds to ask this crazy girl a really important question.

"So you really think I go to your high school?" I asked her, grinning.

"Ugh! You're dead," she huffed.

"No, seriously - you think I _still go_ to high school?" I was amused, but I didn't want her to know that. Instead, I feigned being annoyed.

Her eyes widened. "What are you talking about?"

"For your information, _miss_, I'm twenty-two years old," I told her as sweetly as I could with my death glare smile. I knew she didn't miss my eyes narrowing at her in suppressed anger. "Are you going to continue your threats now? You're what, sixteen? Seventeen? You do realize that I can report you to your school, or much worse, _real_ enforcers of the law, and you might very well be considered for an institution?"

"I... uh…" was all she could say.

"Or do you want me to sue you for all your silicone-filled boobs and ass are worth, princess?" I added. By this time, I had my arms crossed over my chest.

She stood frozen in her place, blinking a few times; she started to look as if she'd seen the boogie man in me. _I wish I could have handled myself better than that time… with those three… Tanya, Jessica and Lauren… just like with this life-sized Barbie…_

I shook my head at her, while she kept silent. "Right, I thought as much. Now shoo. Off with you." I said, putting in as much coldness as I could in the last thing I said - while pretending to wave my hand at her, as if she were some fly. Unconsciously, I cracked my knuckles - a bad habit I had acquired over the past year.

She walked away with a face red in embarrassment, and eyes filled with fear. "This is the real world, missy," I added sourly, when I knew she was still in earshot. _No knight in shining armor is there to protect you _all_ of the time_. _I know that from experience._

I wasn't weak anymore. Two and a half years of self defense lessons had toughened me up significantly. _I can still remember the day those two - Lauren and Jessica - had given me a bloody nose… _

I'm different now!

_Being best friends with the "hottest" guy on campus can only have horrible consequences, most of the time. In my case, I was an easy target for one particular consequence. _

_One word: bullying. _

_At first, I didn't realize that I was in fact being bullied… until one stupid, stupid day…_

"_Hey, Swan? Can we talk to you over by the gym real quick?" Tanya chirped. _

_In the back of my mind, I knew it didn't sound right. Who calls someone to have a supposed talk with them… in a secluded place? During lunch? When all of the people were in the cafeteria? _

_Sadly, I was an idiot of a naïve girl at the time. "S-sure," I gulped._

_I arrived in the dimly lit gym. There were two dark figures in the center already, and fear was definitely what I was feeling at that moment. So why had I not run away? Because I was dumb at the time. _

"_Hey, _Isabella," _said the figure to the left, "knew you couldn't resist us." _

"_Yeah, _Bells_," continued the one in the middle. _

_The lights then switched off, giving the gym an eerie lighting. Then it all happened at once. I heard a click behind me; it was Tanya - the messenger who called on me earlier - guarded the exit. I was done for._

"_W-what do you guys want?" my voice was shaking. I was scared of them, yeah, but I couldn't find the courage to run away. Deep inside, I was screaming for Edward to come save me… somehow…_

"_We need to teach you a lesson, dear," said Jessica, as she winked to Lauren on her left. Their eyes were glinting with malice. _

_Lauren and Jessica jogged to me and grabbed me by my shoulders. Before I knew it, my right cheek throbbed in pain due to its collision with the hard wooden floor of the gym. A pool of liquid crimson started to gather around my face, as I was pinned to the floor. I tried to gasp, but my face hurt too much. I also felt that I was slowly losing my grip on consciousness…_

_Blood. My face was bleeding, and I was about to faint. I knew I had to get up and get away from the pool of red, but couldn't. The sharp stiletto heel of Tanya's shoe was piercing my upper back, not letting me get up. "That's what you get for being too _friendly_ with Edward, Swan." It was Tanya who said that. It looked pretty clear, how she ordered Lauren and Jessica around, that she was the leader. _

"_And you won't be able to tell anyone! Hah, who'll believe you, queen of klutzes?" Tanya was laughing bitterly while leaving with her two cronies. I wanted to cry. I felt so helpless. Before I could do anything, I passed out… but not before hearing the ear shattering sound of my Angel's voice screaming out my name. "BELLA!" I heard him shout, agonized._

_I awoke only to find myself in a white room. A white hospital room. As I scanned the room around me, I found I wasn't alone. Edward held my right hand enclosed in both of his, while his head rested on the small space on my right. _

"_E-edward?" I whispered._

_His eyes shot open and they looked blood shot red. He then looked up at me. "BELLA!" he said frantically, "how are you feeling? How's your head? Your stitches! Don't move or yo-" I had to stop him from talking._

_I chuckled, while silencing him with my finger on his perfect lips. "Wait, wait, one question at a time."_

"_O… okay. Are you feeling all right?" Edward gripped my hand tighter, showing his concern._

"_I feel like I'm floating, but I'm all right." I answered. _

"_It must be the morphine taking effect."_

"_Must… be." I whispered._

"_Don't move so much, okay? Especially your head. You have 6 stitches…"_

_My eyes widened. I hadn't tried to think about what might have happened to me to cause this, but this definitely made me remember. "Edward…" I croaked "how'd I end up here?" _

_Edward looked as if he was about to go out and kill someone. "I overheard Jessica, Lauren and _Tanya_ talking in the hallway about leaving you there in the gym to learn your lesson. I was so terrified of what they'd done to you…. But it didn't compare to when I actually _saw_ you. I carried you to the clinic and we had to call 911_

"_Oh god, Bella… I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry…"he said, as he struggled with his words._

_I blinked back my tears. "Why are you apologizing?! Stop it. You're always so guilty about the weirdest things." _

"_I wasn't there… in time… they… to you… because of me…" he was almost crying. It didn't look like the confident, poker face, ice cold Edward I knew. So for the first time ever, I didn't restrain myself from the immediate urge to engulf him in my embrace. So I did. Well, with the good arm I had, I pulled my right hand out of his hands, and pulled him close to me in a half hug. My left arm had an IV in it and was too far away. This would have to do._

"_Hush now, I'm safe, see? Stop being such a worry wart…" I felt him nod in my right shoulder. I'd never seen a teenage boy look so vulnerable in my entire life. Why he was so affected, I didn't know. I guess I became that much of a good friend to him, as he has become the love of my life. He didn't show this side of him to anyone else, aside from me - that much I knew._

"_I got them though," he whispered. _

"_What do you… mean?" I whispered back, dreadful. He hadn't hurt the three, had he? I didn't want his future in Jeopardy just for my sake!_

_As if he knew what I was thinking, he answered, "I didn't hurt them, Bella… I just reported them. I found the video surveillance tape for the gym… showed it to the police, and that confirmed my statement from what I overheard… they'll be dealt with properly. They won't be going to our school anymore."_

"_Oh."I managed to breathe out. "Thank you, Edward."_

"_Anything for you, Bella, anything and everything."_

_And then there was nothing left to say. We just stayed there, embracing each other, until my father cleared his throat, while standing at the doorway. _

Eight a.m. It was time for me to walk to my job. The small publishing company I worked for was situated just adjacent to a junior college. It was the same junior college Edward and I had been studying in until 2 years and 7 months ago…

But… I made it a point to hide from him in the last place he'd look for me in the past couple of years and a half. The _same_ place. Okay, I didn't really leave… him. After 2 years in junior college, I knew I had to transfer to a real university - and I did. It just wasn't the same one as he went to.

And I didn't tell him exactly which university I transferred to. I had cut all ties with him… 2 years 7 months and 23 days ago.

The air was getting warm, as I felt the sun shining down on me. I pushed my sunglasses up my nose, as I walked down the sidewalk.

A group of three people at the same cross walk as me looked familiar. Good lord… it was Tanya, Jessica and Lauren. They looked like they had aged 10 years!

"Well look at what the cat dragged in," I snorted. They heard me loud and clear, and turned their heads around to look at me.

"YOU!" Tanya hissed. Lauren and Jessica were just too shocked to give a proper reaction. And I guess they were passed their immature stage… and Tanya, clearly, wasn't.

"Me?" I asked innocently "What about me? Such a warm greeting, girls."

"Enough, Tanya," Lauren stood in front of her. Jessica looked at me apologetically, mouthing "I'm sorry… Tanya…." I guess the two really did change already. I was just kind of saddened that Tanya hadn't.

"Whatever, so you guys go to Pasadena City College?" I was trying to redeem myself from my rude behavior to the two. I didn't forgive them, but I didn't necessarily hate them.

"Yeah…" answered Jessica "this is our last semester here till we transfer to our universities."

"What about you, Bella? Do you still go to PCC, too?" asked Lauren. Tanya had gone on ahead to the 99 cent store nearby. Apparently, she worked there part time. I knew to watch out for her.

"Ah… I guess so, you can say that." I told them honestly.

"Huh?" she answered.

"I'm going to be teaching English here in the near future."

"Oh…"

We ended our small conversation on a good note, with the two of them mentioning how sorry they were about what they did to me in high school. Truly, it was all Tanya's idea, but why still follow her to this day, I would have no clue.

I then realized that there was still a silver lining to all this…

I had made in through college properly… and faster too. Comparing my life to those… three, I had it better than they did.

And that now, I knew I could handle potentially harmful situations. Even if I knew he wouldn't be there to send me to the hospital. Or be there to hug me when it hurt. Or be there to tell me to _breathe_, when I was having a panic attack.

It's been 2 years 7 months and 23 days since I've felt his warm embrace…

The last time was _that_ dinner I had with him. The night I decided I wouldn't tell him I'd disappear from his life forever.

It's been roughly around 1,370,880 minutes since… he told me things would be okay.

Not that I'm counting or anything…

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**Author's note:**

**I feel BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOCKED again… tralalalalala….**

**Sorry loves ******


	6. Summer Before Sophomore Year

_She's already taken,_

_She's already taken,_

_She's already taken me._

_("The Day You Said Good Night" by Hale)_

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**2 Years 7 Months 23 Days**

**Summer before Sophomore Year (Edward's Point of View)**

Minutes turned into hours. Hours turned into days. Days into uncountable weeks.

And now, two years, seven months and god knows how many days later… I've lost track of the number of days. Every time I try and remember the precise day, the spot where my heart used to be aches like oblivion sucking me in.

I'm stuck in the past. I fear it has become my present, and also my future.

The telephone rang suddenly, causing me to avert my gaze from my window. The clock read 8 p.m.. I sighed, before picking up.

"Hello?"

"_Edward, son, it's me. How are you?_" asked an all too familiar voice.

I tried to sound enthusiastic, though I don't know how that worked. "Dad! It's been too long. I'm sorry I don't normally call… but I'm good, you?"

"…_I'm alright. Okay, no small talk - I'm tired and I want to go to sleep. Look, come back home, son,_" said Carlisle, my father since a decade ago who adopted me, told me.

"Wha- dad, I've barely started med school… what's wrong? Is everyone okay back there?" I asked, worried. I wasn't sure if I was hearing him right.

"_Edward…_" he paused.

"Yes... ?" I answered in barely a whisper. I dreaded this would happen.

"_You don't think we've noticed, do you?_" asked Carlisle almost too carefully.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about," I answered, but I knew I didn't sound convincing. Oh god, they knew. They knew about me and Bella.

I had shown my family a pretty good show for almost the past 3 years of my perfect façade - unaffected, serene. Of course, that's a lie. The only thing keeping me together was my apathy.

And I wasn't going to show them just how much of a wreck I've been for almost 3 years now.

"_Son, you're almost 23 years old, but that isn't a good enough reason to say your memory's gone bad that you've forgotten we've raised you. We know you better than you think,"_ he replied.

I closed my eyes, and pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Um… okay, let's say you're correct, which you probably are - but really… what's your prognosis then, Doctor Cullen?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Carlisle chuckled lightly. "_Right, well… I'm sorry to say this, Mister… Cullen, but I'm afraid you haven't that much longer to live. No, let me re-phrase… because in fact, you're already six feet under."_

"That's not very professional, Dad! Confusing a patient like that, tsk," I didn't catch his point fast enough.

He laughed again but abruptly stopped, putting on a serious tone of voice. _"Oh, son… Why have you turned into a zombie?"_ Oh. That sure hit the spot.

I stared into space while listening to his continuation. "_You don't visit us enough. You don't call enough, either. And you've pretty much lost contact with your siblings. Are you avoiding us… or _Forks_?"_ He stressed the final word in his sentence.

I couldn't very well tell him that I'm haunted by my all too vivid memories with _her_ that if I even tried to visit places infused of _our_ memories, I might just show them how much a grown man could cry…

So I gulped and decided to try and change the subject. "Dad, I do too call! I'm just busy with school is all," I reassured him, though I'm pretty sure I sounded like a whiny 13 year old.

"_School, right, right,"_ he replied with his Father voice. "_If you say so. I won't ask for details, you know that… but come home, do you understand? Your mother misses you, as do your siblings."_

I knew I wouldn't win, so I just obliged. "Okay. I'll take a semester off…"

"_See you soon then."_

"You approve." I stated, but it sounded more like a question.

"_Yes, I approve. Your point being?"_

"You're the parent here!!!" I tried once again to lighten the mood, but to no avail.

"_Yes, but your mother is worried. That's the end of that conversation. Just come back home."_

" Fine… okay, since this semester started, do you want me to take this one off?"

"_Sure," _there was a moment of silence, as I realized he was talking to someone else in the room, "_sure, kiddo," _I then heard a high pitched squeal, which could only come from a pixie-human called Alice, my adoptive sister.

Carlisle asked, "_Edward, can you drop by Los Angeles before you get back here?"_

"Yeah, sure, how come though?"

"_Your sister Alice wants one of those local Starbucks coffee mugs that show the location of the place."_

"Coffee mug… uh, okay." I knew my sister was odd, but this topped the list of random. I had a feeling in the back of my mind that she was secretly plotting something. Or it had something to do with her "visions" in her dreams. _Great, just what the world would need - a more caffeinated Alice._

"_Take care, son."_ Carlisle said.

"You too, and please tell everyone I said hi and I love them, especially Mom."

"_You're such a suck up!!" _said a booming voice, which I knew could only come from my adoptive brother, Emmett.

I laughed a bit, but that was that. My mood wasn't lifted; it hasn't been since the day she disappeared. After that dinner.

I hung up. I was on speaker phone, apparently. I don't remember how I got into my bedroom, all my thoughts were about how my dad knew of my "condition". I still felt like the whole world was out to get me with the addition of a rain cloud permanently stuck above my head. I just gave up, and let sleep consume me - however light and unsatisfying it has been for almost 3 years now.

Just how would I be able to tell them?

How would I be able to tell them that all of a sudden, after being accepted by the University of California in Irvine over 2 years ago, Bella just stopped talking to me and disappeared**? **

_The summer before our Sophomore year was fantastic. Everyday, it was just me and Bella. Bella and I. Bella and me. Bella with me. Goodness…_

"_MOM I'M HOOOOME," I hollered as I entered our house._

_Bella followed suit, and also yelled "I'M HOME TOO MOM!" She practically lived at my house and so was part of our family, too. But the way she said it made my heart soar. She was part of my family… almost as if we were… we were…_

That after telling me she also got accepted in the same university, she just "changed her mind" and went off to some other university, without telling me where… ?

_Before I could finish that train of thought, my mom arrived to greet us._

"_Welcome back, kids. What's your agenda for today?" Esme asked us. _

_I shrugged. "Wrestling, I guess." _

"_Edward! Bella's a girl!"Esme said, as she put on a mock horror expression._

_Bella beside me was just in a fit of giggles. "I think we need to call the McCarty's, then." _

"_Oh, no need dear, Emmett and his parents are coming over for some brunch." _

"_Perfect!" Bella and I said at the same time. My head whipped to look at Bella. _

_Bella smirked and said, "don't worry, silly butt, I won't wrestle! I'm the referee!"_

"_Haha, wow, the world's clumsiest referee. Okay, okay… in the meantime, let's get some chips." _

_And so we stalked into the kitchen, grabbed some snacks and made our way to the living room and waited for Emmett and the rest of our best friends. _

How would I be able to tell them that every day since then, I've endlessly been wondering what I did to ruin our friendship? What I did so wrong that she had to leave, I wanted to know; but I'm without a way to find out.

"_Hey Bells?"I turned to face Bella, as she watched intently at the TV. It was a re-run of an old Simpsons episode._

"_Yeah?" she answered without turning to look at me. _

"_What are you going to take up in college?" _

_She blinked three times real fast. "I, uh, I - English… but I'm going to a junior college first, it's cheaper in the long run," her family wasn't poor, but they made just enough. She meant that she wouldn't do all four years of her college life in a university, but partially get her required classes at a junior college. "What about you?"_

"_Oh, same. Not English though. Just some biology for pre-med…" I didn't want to directly tell her that I was going to do the same thing she was. Junior college and then university._

_She seemed to realize what I meant and quickly asked, "EDWARD! Why would you want to go to a junior college when you can go to Stanford University or the like of for the whole 4 years?! Don't do that!!!" _

"_Calm down, calm down - silly Bella! I don't want to waste money, you know? If it's worth less, then it will be the preferable choice." And if you're there, that's where I'm going anyway - I wanted to add. "Besides, it's only 2 years!"_

_Having recovered and seemingly remembered her more frugal side, Bella continued, "uhhh… okay… so… you staying and go to one of Seattle's community colleges? North, central or south?" she asked. I tilted my head to the side, then I understood what she meant._

"_You mean you're not going to stay in Washington…?" I asked her, confused._

"_I-er…crap, yeah… I was meaning to go to California…" She bit her lower lip. Did she not want to have told me that…?_

"_Okay. One sec." I stood up, and went to the door frame leading to the kitchen, stuck my head in and saw my mom. "Mom, can I go to a community college in California please?"I then mouthed, "BELLA. CALIFORNIA. PLEASE?" I knew Bella couldn't see my face and I didn't want her to hear that last part. _

"_Sure, Edward," said Esme, loud enough so that Bella would hear._

"_EDWARD!!!!!!!!" Bella yelled while she blushed crimson._

_My mom Esme just smiled warmly at me, winked and mouthed back, "good luck."_

How could I handle them and their pitying faces? They knew… these people knew that if Bella told me to jump off a bridge, I would do so with a smile on my face.

_The door bell rang. _

"_YO!!! I'm hoooome!" yelled Emmett this time Bella and I laughed out loud. _

But at the same time… they would rub it in, that they also told me to "do something about it, and ask her out already" but I didn't heed their advice. How would I face their reactions?

"_We're in here, Em!" Bella called out to Emmett. Bella continued, "and HI MR. AND MRS. MCCARTY!!!"_

"_Hi Bella, Edward!" both of Emmett's parents responded, with voices echoing down the corridors._

_Sure enough, we heard Emmett's footsteps as he went to the living room. "Hi Mr. and Mrs. Cullen!" Emmett flashed a knowing smile to us._

_I laughed. "Not yet, but hi, Em!"I smiled back to him. By this time, Emmett had a smirk on his face when he noticed that Bella and I were seated in the one loveseat available. I could tell Bella was blushing very bad; but it made me happy nonetheless._

"_The whole gang's gonna be here soon," said Emmett._

"_Oh, cool." I then turned back to what Bella and I were watching, completely forgetting the wrestling match I was to have with Emmett. Not that I minded. _

_Everyone else arrived in time for a new episode of the Simpsons marathon. They basically did the same thing each time one of them arrived. After Emmett was Jasper, and a few seconds later, his twin Rosalie, and finally Alice._

_They looked around the room, checking for attendance._

_Zeroed in on us._

_Shot their eyebrows up in unison for 2 seconds._

_Plastered a smug grin on their faces._

_Wiped the said grin off; sat down. _

_Then finally, greeted us nonchalantly and asked what we were going to do for the day. They all knew of my feelings for Bella. They all knew. _

_Could they have been more obvious? I think not._

Torture, pure torture. And now I had to face both siblings and friends again.

* * *

The next day proved to be as uneventful as any other. Telling my medical school I needed a break was effortless, as it only took less than an hour of me in their registration office. And that included 30 minutes of trying to beat women off with a stick (oh if only I could literally).

After settling my temporary vacation with my school at 7:30, I decided to visit Pasadena City College - the junior college where Bella and I went to - just because there was a Starbucks in front of it. I figured I could kill two birds with one stone - get Alice's mug, and become desensitized. The drive was shorter than I thought.

At this point, re-visiting places with _our_ memories wouldn't prove to be so horrible. I needed to desensitize myself anyway, as I was going to go back to the place with the most memories of ours - Forks. But for now… a quick visit to our junior college.

At nine in the morning, I arrived at Pasadena City College and parked my car in one of the parking structures. I got out and bought a six dollar parking day permit, put it on my dashboard, and walked the all familiar pathway out to Colorado boulevard, and to Starbucks. On the way there, I walked passed by the same old buildings with our classes. And finally, as I neared the crosswalk to the Starbucks, the library. I made a mental note to visit this place after my coffee break.

The Starbucks hadn't changed in the 2 and a half years I hadn't seen it. The smell that hit my nose as soon as I stepped in screamed of nostalgia. I felt my heart drop to my stomach, the familiar excitement I had when I knew I would see Bella sitting in our… corner table. As if by instinct, the moment I ordered my brew of the day, I settled down in our usual table and waited for my drink; in my peripheral vision, I swear I could have seen Bella… but no, I knew better. It was my mind playing tricks on me. But I could swear our spot, our table, smelled of sweet Freesia…. I just wondered how much my mind was tricking me. I got up and picked up my drink and went back into our old spot, and continued sulking.

I really would have preferred to continue sulking, but I was interrupted from my Bella-filled thoughts with the one nasal voice I knew I would have forever…

"LIKE, OH MY GOSH!!!" The voice gushed. "Edward CULLEN, is that you?!?!?!"

I turned my head and recognized her face all too well. "T-tanya, fancy meeting _you_ here." I replied with as much sarcasm I could muster. Of course, she didn't get it.

"Oh geez, wow, so like, you go to PCC???" she asked.

"No." I answered uninterested, because I wasn't.

"So you came to visit _her?_" she asked in a disgusted tone…. And I knew that tone was reserved only for one person I knew.

Bella.

My eyes widened and I asked her, "WHO?"

Bella. She was close. My Bella was nearby! … I think.

"Oh… uh… Jessica! Yeah, that's right!!!! Jessica Stanley! She's here too." She tried to cover up something, which I don't know what. What did she not want to tell me?

"Right…" I answered.

"So, like, you knowwww…" she continued in a voice that had me realizing I wanted a way out of here, and fast. "I'm, like, here in LA to make it out as an actreeeess."

"That's nice." Good God, was she testing out my patience?

"Yeah… and like… were you… did you see my in Kiss The Night???" she asked

What was she talking about? "Uh, no." I replied. What kind of movie was THAT? Porn?!

"I was in that moooovie! It was a small role but I swear the bitch just slept with the casting director or somethingggg, I was going to get the rooole!" she whined.

"Uh… good luck next time?" I looked at my watch, finding a reason to leave. "Oh look at the time. I have to go! Nice seeing you again." I hope to never see you ever again though.

As I stood up, Tanya said, "thanks! We should like, have drinks together sometime." She purred. I took a step away. "Um… I'm only in town for today, sorry."

"Aww that's too bad!" Tanya looked down at the table and saw something I didn't notice before. "You forgot your envelope, Eddie!" I hated it when she called me that.

"Um… thanks." I answered her. For some reason, even thought I knew that the envelope belonged to someone else, it called for me. I was normally the person who if they found a cellphone on the floor of a bathroom, I'd find whose it was and return it to the owner at whatever cost. Why was this envelope different…?

Turning the corner after I crossed the stress, I remembered my mental note and went to visit my junior college's library. "SHATFORD LIBRARY" was the sign at the very top of the majestic looking 3 storey building. I entered the familiar library and headed to my usual corner table.

I found the address of the publishing house on the envelope. I was glad because now I could return it properly. I then opened the yellow envelope and took out the contents. White copy paper, one inch thick, stapled and had red ink scribbles all over. I figured it was a manuscript of some book, and was being edited…

By an editor. With an English major. Which was Bella's major.

All right, my imagination is going too crazy, I thought to myself. I was looking for Bella, and too much desperate for her. I had to stop.

But then as I was calming myself down, I saw another piece of paper with writing in it. It looked like notes about the manuscript's content. I would've just stuffed it back inside the envelope, but the handwriting INSTANTLY caught my eye.

It was her handwriting. Bella's handwriting! I could spot it from a mile away.

And at the left edge of the binder paper, by the margin, with what looked to be the "test out spot" for ink pens, I saw… two words that made my heart drop beyond my stomach, all the way to my feet.

Anyway, you know those scribbles? When the ink doesn't flow right away, that you had to write on something first? Yeah. First the ink is light… then it gets dark.

_Sorry Edward_, it said. In blood red colored ink. _Sorry Edward_.

Bella's HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

With that, all thoughts of the forgotten mug I was to buy Alice went out the window.

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**Author's notes:**

**Hahahahha Edward just about pissed his pants!!!! Lol and OMG … 3200 words… wow…. **

**Hopefully this chapter clears a few questions lol If not, ASK!**

**Anyway, sorry for the delay in updates in ALL of my stories, folks. I'll work harder!**


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